Thursday, May 08, 2008

The Consultant

I had my first phone conversation with the Consultant who I will call Mr. Fabulous (of Mr. Fab for short). I called because he lives about 1800 miles away. I called to set up our first "Official" phone meeting (which we scheduled for next week). In this initial phone conversation he invited me to give him some history. Well, I said, I've come from a small church to a large church. I've come from an all volunteer staff (or at least that's what it was for the last little while I worked there) and into a paid staff of 6 and a 8 volunteers. I've left a place where I was for 10 years and knew everyone to a place where I know no one...and I've been here 8 weeks.

None of that is the issue. The issue is something else....it's some interpersonal stuff...the kind of stuff that happens all the time in church dynamics. And, while I understand it, I really want a third, un-related, entity to process with, for perspective. To keep ME healthy. To keep ME thinking clearly. Also, this is what he does for a living - consult clergy and churches on group dynamic, church staff dynamics.

We had a good first conversation. And I felt affirmed in the decisions I have made thus far. He asks good questions and will point me to think things through in ways I might not otherwise, in addition to helping me feel more confident. So. That will ease some of my stress.

Not a bad week thus far...

14 comments:

Hot Cup Lutheran said...

i think it is very astute of you to seek him out! sometimes the more people there are the wierder things get for whatever reason... but even with all that the Spirit still moves. amazing!

they are blessed to have you... and you are blessed to have them.

Ruth Hull Chatlien said...

I salute you for taking this move, and I'm so glad the process has started.

Songbird said...

Glad you have this source of support!

RevDrKate said...

Glad it went well in the first connection with your consultant, such a wise and self-caring thing to do for yourself. Prayers for you continue.

Rev SS said...

Yes, very wise ... and I, too an glad it went well. Continue prayers.

Grace thing said...

(((Mompriest)))))))))))))

Counselor in Process said...

Yea, my support and prayers are with you, too. I'm glad you have the help. Do you have a board of directors to deal with? Or are you the pastor/CEO? (neither situation is particularly good having worked in a number of non-profits.)

mompriest said...

I am the Rector, which in Episcopal language means head Pastor or Senior Clergyperson. I am however the youngest person on staff, so that's one dynamic. I do also have a board or what we call a vestry, of elected non-ordained people, who help make decisions. Primarily the interesting dynamics among staff members, but there are other interesting dynamics in and amongs other parish entities...all of them around "Boundaries"...

Mary Beth said...

You rock. :)

Diane said...

all I can say is: Good for YOU! You are doing absolutely the right thing.

Counselor in Process said...

Boundaries. Now you're talking my language. Appropriate boundaries are so important, and knowing when to pick a fight and when to let go. It must be truly difficult to be the Rector yet have older staff.(and a chorus of second guessers) I hope the guy helps you. If you ever want to vent, just come on over to my place or e-mail me at jordanash@mac.com.
And remember they're testing you, too. That torture to the new guy/rector that will always happen!
J

mompriest said...

Thanks!

Katherine E. said...

Just want to thank you for sharing, mompriest. You and your staff are in my prayers.

hip2B said...

A consultant huh? Sounds like a great idea...didn't know there were such people out there for churches...I will try to squirrel this info away.

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