Last

I am in the process of living through a series of "last time"...the last time I will have lunch with this particular group of women clergy. The last time I will see this massage therapist. The last time I will see this acupuncturist. The last time I will take this walk. The last time I will make this drive. And so on.

Much of my energy has been focused on finding the date when we will move and thus establishing this cycle of "last time." Now that we have that date, and the truck has been ordered, and the packing is in full swing, the lasts are all happening too.

Yesterday I drove, for the last time, the beautiful back road desert drive, to my Spiritual Director's house. You may remember that my SD here is the same SD I saw for many years when I lived in Chicago. I began having monthly visits with her when I was in seminary, 15 years ago. We continued long after seminary and through my first two calls as a priest. Then, about five years ago she retired and moved west. We said our goodbye's and I supposed she was gone from my life, except for the occasional card or email now and then.

That is until I move out here too. Almost two years ago, to the day, I arrived in this desert SE area. And within about a month I was back to having monthly meeting with my SD. We picked up, after some three years, where we left off. I filled her in on all that had happened in my life and vocation. And over the last two years she has been a staple and a grounding force in an otherwise barren prickly place.

As I left her yesterday I gave her a hug and said, "Goodbye, for now." and then I said, "I suspect our paths will cross again, somewhere, someplace." She laughed and said "Yes, I suspect they will."

Somethings end. And some things last...

Comments

Gannet Girl said…
SO glad you have had the gift of her presence during this rocky time.

I thought I was going to go to Chicago at the end of the month, but now I'm not. However, having been able to imagine it, I am now thinking that I am going to go by the end of the summer. I have some people to see and some ashes to scatter surreptitiously. It would be wonderful to meet you then!
Sherry said…
This must be a difficult transitional period for you. But there is some closure at least in the closing of the chapter. I pray for you always. My thoughts are with you. :)
Songbird said…
What a gift to have that continuing relationship with her, for both of you.
Tripp Hudgins said…
I can only echo what was said and to offer some hot beverage or another when you get back to Chicago. Don't hesitate to get together.
Mompriest said…
Tripp, I'll be there in early March. As soon as I'm settled we'll have a cup of coffee...
Mompriest said…
Thank you, everyone...yes, many gifts amongst the difficulty
Jan said…
last=first. Chapters ending and chapters beginning are hard, but in retrospect can be laden with grace. You often see grace, just as your good-bye to your SD indicated. Paths are interwoven.
I am glad that you are taking time to consciously say good-bye to this stage of your life.

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